I went to lunch with a few friends at a barbeque restaurant nearby. The food was good, the service was friendly, and the conversation was fun and lively. As the meal progressed, one of the peopel eating with me realized they had a "random connection" with our waitress through a brother that taught at the high school she attended, so we used that for a series of jokes and jabs. After we finished our meal, the waitress came up and asked us if we wanted any desserts... we politely replied "no thanks." She replied by describing the chocolate meringue and lemon meringue pies with details that almost had us convinced... but we resisted anyway. Then, with sincerity (and a little salesmanship) the waitress asked a unique question: "What is that hasn't convinced you yet?" The question was simple, unassuming, and appropriately phrased given the relationship we had developed with her during the previous hour. And, with that question, one member of our party said that he simply didn't have room for a piece today, but he would get one the next time he came. And, with that, she wished us a good day and we left.
Contrast that situation with the rants that Christians sometimes get on about certain issues or the fights we get in with certain people, and it becomes easy to see why the "Good News" about Jesus is often misunderstood or simply rejected. Persuasion is pretty easy... convincing someone to believe or act a certain way can be accomplished in many ways... withold basic necessities of life... threaten greater harm... use force... take advantage of "positional authority"... lie... embellish... or any other of a thousand different methods. But persuasion that isn't pushy is a rare thing. Persuasion based on a relationship that leads to a perfectly-phrased and perfectly-timed question is the key to a lot of situations.
We want people to choose to become Christ followers. Sometimes that journey takes a long time for a person. But, that's okay. We will continue to see people as people (instead of the next notch in our belt). We will continue to provide a place for them to explore faith at their own speed. We will continue to build friendships with them because we understand how important it can be to know the people you journey with. And, along the way, we will ask them questions (like "what is it that hasn't convinced you yet?"), listen to their answers, listen to their questions, and answer them as best we can. Then, if they are still not convinced, we will wish them a good day, and be available when they continue their spiritual pursuit in the future. It seems like "persuasion," but it's actually something else... it's persuasive compassion.
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Monday, May 28, 2007
The Truth of Proportion
Some truths are simply too important to avoid or put aside. Two weeks ago, we saw a guy in Costa Maya that was in full violation of the Truth of Proportion. Allow me to explain... when it comes to swimsuits... the size of the swimsuit should be in direct proportion to the size of the guy wearing it. Clearly, "Mr Speedo" doesn't understand this... but I pray that sometime, somebody that has a relationship with "Mr Speedo" will teach him this basic principle for living.
So, this post is really more for the friends and family of "Mr Speedo" instead of "Mr Speedo" himself. He is living in violation of a basic truth... and he doesn't even know it. If you know him, help him, in a loving way, understand it.
Even worse, there are others that walk around in life as if there is NO truth worth following. You may know some people like that... people that have decided there is no God, or that he is not worth following, or that people that follow him are hypocrites, or that his word is not worth paying attention to. If you know someone like that, help them, in a loving way, understand truth.
Saturday, May 26, 2007
People are talkin'... talkin' 'bout people
I majored in relationship development at the University of Georgia. I took lots of classes about how people communicate... what they say... how they act... body language... voice inflection... eye contact, etc. And, the basic point of all my classes is that we communicate all the time, with everything. In other words, whether you like it or not, every time there is someone that can see, hear, or smell you... you are communicating something to them.
And, that communication to others causes them to communicate as well... sometimes they communicate something back to you... sometimes they communicate something about you to someone else. Basically, the song is right... people are talkin'... talkin' 'bout people.
So, with that in mind, what are you communicating? I recently spent some time in a public situation with some people that came across as arrogant, snooty, and entitled (don't worry, I'm not talking about you... if you are reading this blog, you weren't there). Many of the people in the room were believers, and there were probably some that were not. I was helping them with something, and only one of them was helping me. The rest were either oblivious to me or came across as if they were "'better" than me in their own eyes... and "better" than another person that was in the room... a person that was not a believer.
One of the ways that Church At The Grove attempts to extend God's love to others is by starting discussions. The basic idea is that if people are talking about spiritual things, then God will show up and reveal himself to them (this is God's idea... he talks about it in the book of Jeremiah). When we are in charge of these discussions, we try to make them effective and intentional... pointing people to Jesus. When we are unaware of these discussions, we so often come across as uncaring, aloof, arrogant, snooty or entitled. As you go through life, don't become unaware of what you are communicating. People around you are watching what you do, hearing what you say, taking in everything about your life... and they are "understanding" what you are communicating to them. Are they hearing that they are important to a God out there that made them and loves them and sent his son for them? Or, are they hearing that you are "better" than them?
And, that communication to others causes them to communicate as well... sometimes they communicate something back to you... sometimes they communicate something about you to someone else. Basically, the song is right... people are talkin'... talkin' 'bout people.
So, with that in mind, what are you communicating? I recently spent some time in a public situation with some people that came across as arrogant, snooty, and entitled (don't worry, I'm not talking about you... if you are reading this blog, you weren't there). Many of the people in the room were believers, and there were probably some that were not. I was helping them with something, and only one of them was helping me. The rest were either oblivious to me or came across as if they were "'better" than me in their own eyes... and "better" than another person that was in the room... a person that was not a believer.
One of the ways that Church At The Grove attempts to extend God's love to others is by starting discussions. The basic idea is that if people are talking about spiritual things, then God will show up and reveal himself to them (this is God's idea... he talks about it in the book of Jeremiah). When we are in charge of these discussions, we try to make them effective and intentional... pointing people to Jesus. When we are unaware of these discussions, we so often come across as uncaring, aloof, arrogant, snooty or entitled. As you go through life, don't become unaware of what you are communicating. People around you are watching what you do, hearing what you say, taking in everything about your life... and they are "understanding" what you are communicating to them. Are they hearing that they are important to a God out there that made them and loves them and sent his son for them? Or, are they hearing that you are "better" than them?
Friday, May 25, 2007
Relational Collision
Last night I had the chance to watch American Idol with 16 other adults and some of their kids. The show was pretty predictable... I think since the week that Sanjaya left, everyone in the country pretty much knew that Jordin would win... right?... okay, so not EVERYONE knew that... but YOU did!?!
What was not as predictable was the party we hosted... a total of 18 different adults from 21- 32 years old (Amy and I were the oldest in the room), single and married, kids and no kids, all with different spiritual backgrounds and different family backgrounds. Most of the people last night were first-time guests in our home... we knew several of them pretty well, but there were also many that we didn't know and even more of them didn't know each other. Lots of things could have gone wrong... but nothing did. It could have been an entire house full of people that had nothing to talk about with each other... but that didn't happen either. In other words, it could have been a relational flop... but it turned into a relational collision... different people... different lives... different perspectives... living life... and sharing it with others.
So we watched American Idol and we talked about our jobs, our families, and our predictions for the results. And we lived life... together. It was awesome. Maybe you should try it? Pick a night this Summer and invite a bunch of people to come be guests in your home... then, relax and see what happens. Maybe it will flop. Or maybe, just maybe, people will collide and relationships will happen. See you Sunday!
What was not as predictable was the party we hosted... a total of 18 different adults from 21- 32 years old (Amy and I were the oldest in the room), single and married, kids and no kids, all with different spiritual backgrounds and different family backgrounds. Most of the people last night were first-time guests in our home... we knew several of them pretty well, but there were also many that we didn't know and even more of them didn't know each other. Lots of things could have gone wrong... but nothing did. It could have been an entire house full of people that had nothing to talk about with each other... but that didn't happen either. In other words, it could have been a relational flop... but it turned into a relational collision... different people... different lives... different perspectives... living life... and sharing it with others.
So we watched American Idol and we talked about our jobs, our families, and our predictions for the results. And we lived life... together. It was awesome. Maybe you should try it? Pick a night this Summer and invite a bunch of people to come be guests in your home... then, relax and see what happens. Maybe it will flop. Or maybe, just maybe, people will collide and relationships will happen. See you Sunday!
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Environmentalism?
Environmentalism has long been associated with derogatory terms like "tree-hugger" and tacky slogans like "Save the Whales." Certainly, God cares about His creation, and we could all stand to be a little more concerned about keeping the earth healthy into the future. But, for a minute, think about the underlying "cause" for an environmentalist... living with an appropriate balance of taking advantage of the incredible creation of God, while ensuring that enough effort is made to keep that creation available for generations to come.
With that as our definition, it kind of takes Sunday mornings at Church At The Grove to a new level of understanding. We only do three things here, and one of them is "Creating an environment where people can explore and encounter faith individually and together through God's word." If you will take the time to meet people on Sunday mornings, you will realize that you have done a great job at creating this environment for our guests... but as we enter the Summer and prepare for the Fall, it becomes even more important to live with an appropriate balance of taking advantage of the incredible Sunday morning environment (a lively, energetic and relevant part of this incredible spiritual journey), while putting forth lots of effort to keep this Sunday morning environment available for generations to come. This may involve something as simple as picking up a stray napkin and tossing it in the trash can, or something a little more involved (like teaching Children's Church, or helping in the Baby room, or coming a few minutes early to set-up chairs). Email me if you would like to get a little experience with it over the summer.
So, when you come this Sunday: Enjoy the environment that everyone is working so hard to create; Bring a friend or two with you who need a place to comfortably explore God; And, while you're here, if you see a way to improve the environment for others, jump in and help out... God has called us to protect the environment created in the cafeteria of Youth Middle School every Sunday... God has called us to be "spiritual environmentalists"... there are hundreds/thousands of people in this area that need to be able to connect with God... and we may be the only hope for some of our friends, neighbors, co-workers, and family to hear about Christ in a way that can be understood.
See you Sunday,
Craig Story
With that as our definition, it kind of takes Sunday mornings at Church At The Grove to a new level of understanding. We only do three things here, and one of them is "Creating an environment where people can explore and encounter faith individually and together through God's word." If you will take the time to meet people on Sunday mornings, you will realize that you have done a great job at creating this environment for our guests... but as we enter the Summer and prepare for the Fall, it becomes even more important to live with an appropriate balance of taking advantage of the incredible Sunday morning environment (a lively, energetic and relevant part of this incredible spiritual journey), while putting forth lots of effort to keep this Sunday morning environment available for generations to come. This may involve something as simple as picking up a stray napkin and tossing it in the trash can, or something a little more involved (like teaching Children's Church, or helping in the Baby room, or coming a few minutes early to set-up chairs). Email me if you would like to get a little experience with it over the summer.
So, when you come this Sunday: Enjoy the environment that everyone is working so hard to create; Bring a friend or two with you who need a place to comfortably explore God; And, while you're here, if you see a way to improve the environment for others, jump in and help out... God has called us to protect the environment created in the cafeteria of Youth Middle School every Sunday... God has called us to be "spiritual environmentalists"... there are hundreds/thousands of people in this area that need to be able to connect with God... and we may be the only hope for some of our friends, neighbors, co-workers, and family to hear about Christ in a way that can be understood.
See you Sunday,
Craig Story
Saturday, May 19, 2007
Making Disciples (and a four-letter word)
Three days ago, I wrote that if you're living your life just to impress people, then you're living for the wrong things. Allow me to clarify something in that blog by saying I was listening to the radio on Wednesday, and I heard "Watching You" by Rodney Atkins for the first time. I am quickly becoming a country music fan, and songs like this are the reason why (http://www.elyrics.net/read/r/rodney-atkins-lyrics/watching-you-lyrics.html). This song about a little boy and a four-letter word is one of the clearest descriptions of discipleship that I've heard in a long time. People (especially our kids) watch us and act just like us. So, what do your kids see in your life? What do your actions, words, and attitudes teach them about how to live?
You can't live your life trying to "impress" people with your spirituality. I truly believe this is hypocrisy in its purest form. But, you also can't live your life without understanding the responsibility you do have to certain people in your life. So, when your kids start acting just like you... when they become your "disciples"... will their life be something to be proud of?
P.S. Speaking of how we teach our attitudes, words, and actions to those around us, I got an invitation from the people at the "Noooma" company (www.nooma.com) to go to the premiere of their newest video 016 Store in Atlanta. "Store" is about anger... what it takes to make you angry... what we get angry about... and how we express anger. I went ahead and reserved 6 seats for Amy and I and a few friends. But, if anyone else is interested, let me know so I can get you a couple tickets as well. Tickets are free and the premiere is in Atlanta on Monday, July 11th at 7:00pm.
You can't live your life trying to "impress" people with your spirituality. I truly believe this is hypocrisy in its purest form. But, you also can't live your life without understanding the responsibility you do have to certain people in your life. So, when your kids start acting just like you... when they become your "disciples"... will their life be something to be proud of?
P.S. Speaking of how we teach our attitudes, words, and actions to those around us, I got an invitation from the people at the "Noooma" company (www.nooma.com) to go to the premiere of their newest video 016 Store in Atlanta. "Store" is about anger... what it takes to make you angry... what we get angry about... and how we express anger. I went ahead and reserved 6 seats for Amy and I and a few friends. But, if anyone else is interested, let me know so I can get you a couple tickets as well. Tickets are free and the premiere is in Atlanta on Monday, July 11th at 7:00pm.
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Following Jesus (a lesson learned from two burning butts)
Some of the most interesting conversations I had on the cruise were with believers that felt bad enough about what they were doing that they tried to justify their lives to me... as if I had any ability to make any real judgment calls on their behalf. The guy I met at the bar, for instance, nearly burnt his shorts off as he moved his cigarette behind his back as soon as he asked me what I did for a living and I responded by saying I was a "pastor". I'm not sure why he felt it necessary to put himself at such risk for physical harm just because he was talking to a professional Christian... besides, the smoke rising from his butt made it look like he had a little too much wasabi at the sushi bar. And he was not the only one to quickly change his behavior once they found out I was a pastor. What's up with that?
Sometimes I wonder if people are more concerned about following Jesus on a day by day basis, or more concerned about making sure that "a man of God" does not look down on them with condemnation. Have we forgotten that as believers, we are all "men" or "women" "of God"? Do we honestly think that God does not watch our lives very closely and, as a result, has to rely on ministers to tattle on people? Who are we really concerned about living for?... some ordinary guy with a religious title that we meet while on a six day cruise?... or the creator of everything that gave up everything so that he could spend eternity in a relationship with us?
God sees... he sees everything... all the time... and he is the only one we have to please... living just to please the people around us is unnatural, uncomfortable, impossible, hypocritical, and pointless. And, unfortunately, the only people that spend so much time doing it are believers. The nonbelievers I met on the cruise didn't care about trying to "impress" me or justify themselves to me... and that was refreshing. Trust me, it's much more relaxing to lose $2 in the penny slots beside a nonbeliever that doesn't care about impressing you, than it is to order a virgin margarita beside a believer doing a cigarette contortionist act because he thinks you are going to tell God what he's doing. If you are living life to try to impress anyone but God... stop it... it's not working... and it doesn't help you follow Jesus.
Sometimes I wonder if people are more concerned about following Jesus on a day by day basis, or more concerned about making sure that "a man of God" does not look down on them with condemnation. Have we forgotten that as believers, we are all "men" or "women" "of God"? Do we honestly think that God does not watch our lives very closely and, as a result, has to rely on ministers to tattle on people? Who are we really concerned about living for?... some ordinary guy with a religious title that we meet while on a six day cruise?... or the creator of everything that gave up everything so that he could spend eternity in a relationship with us?
God sees... he sees everything... all the time... and he is the only one we have to please... living just to please the people around us is unnatural, uncomfortable, impossible, hypocritical, and pointless. And, unfortunately, the only people that spend so much time doing it are believers. The nonbelievers I met on the cruise didn't care about trying to "impress" me or justify themselves to me... and that was refreshing. Trust me, it's much more relaxing to lose $2 in the penny slots beside a nonbeliever that doesn't care about impressing you, than it is to order a virgin margarita beside a believer doing a cigarette contortionist act because he thinks you are going to tell God what he's doing. If you are living life to try to impress anyone but God... stop it... it's not working... and it doesn't help you follow Jesus.
Monday, May 14, 2007
Interesting People I Met On The Cruise
I just spent six nights and seven days on the Carnival Liberty cruise ship. I had never been on a cruise before, but I can guarantee you that I will go again. The food was great, the ports were awesome (except for Freeport, which was a little bit of a waste of potential beach space), and the activities were plentiful. But one of the greatest things about the trip was the people I met as we travelled.
I met a disgruntled, former Sunday School director and his wife as we waited for two very different kind of drinks at the poolside bar. I met an elderly world-travelling lady while we waited to see if we won the raffle for the free jewelry from the ship's gift shop. I met a guy and his girlfriend on the panorama deck as they settled in for a little sunbathing... I offered to let the guy read the book I was reading ("Sex God" by Rob Bell) while I got out of the sun for a little bit. I met three couples (all pastors and their spouses) at the Fort Lauderdale airport while we waited for 6 hours for our flight back. And I met many others along the way as well. I wish I could tell you about all of the conversations I had... some of them more important than others... but I don't have time.
The point of all of this is that the trip was great, but the coolest thing about it was the people there with me... the strangers I met... the friends I went with... and all the time I got to spend with my wife. Life is about people. God is about people. Church At The Grove is about people... developing them... helping them experience life change... helping them reconnect with God. Life is a journey... I pray that you enjoy it, but I hope you enjoy the people on the trip with you even more.
I met a disgruntled, former Sunday School director and his wife as we waited for two very different kind of drinks at the poolside bar. I met an elderly world-travelling lady while we waited to see if we won the raffle for the free jewelry from the ship's gift shop. I met a guy and his girlfriend on the panorama deck as they settled in for a little sunbathing... I offered to let the guy read the book I was reading ("Sex God" by Rob Bell) while I got out of the sun for a little bit. I met three couples (all pastors and their spouses) at the Fort Lauderdale airport while we waited for 6 hours for our flight back. And I met many others along the way as well. I wish I could tell you about all of the conversations I had... some of them more important than others... but I don't have time.
The point of all of this is that the trip was great, but the coolest thing about it was the people there with me... the strangers I met... the friends I went with... and all the time I got to spend with my wife. Life is about people. God is about people. Church At The Grove is about people... developing them... helping them experience life change... helping them reconnect with God. Life is a journey... I pray that you enjoy it, but I hope you enjoy the people on the trip with you even more.
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
Miss Me?
In four days, Amy and I leave for a six day cruise to celebrate our 10 year anniversary. I can't begin to explain how excited I am.
I am really looking forward to 7 days of relaxation and "being away from it all," but this seclusion will also be the hardest part of the trip. I know it's important to have some "away" time (especially when it comes to keeping a marriage strong), but I will miss my kids and I will miss my friends and I will miss those that gather with me at Church At The Grove. It will be hard to be out of contact with these people for so long.
Will I be totally unreachable? No. But, it costs $9.50/minute to have a conversation by phone with anyone and $0.75/minute for internet access, so unless I want to spend a fortune, I will just have to settle for taking a "relational break" from everyone here. Quite frankly, that's a little hard to imagine.
So what about you? Are relationships with people important to you... to the point that it hurts when you're away? Surprisingly, a lot of us live our lives without investing time into these important relationships. And, when we're gone for a while, we don't miss anyone and nobody misses us. Unfortunately, that's not the way God designed us. He doesn't want us to live on the outskirts of relationships / friendships / people in general. God wants us to dive in to the middle of the groups of people around us, get to know them, let them get to know us, love them, and let them return that love. Then, even when we're unreachable, at least we'll be missed. I'll see you on Mother's Day.
I am really looking forward to 7 days of relaxation and "being away from it all," but this seclusion will also be the hardest part of the trip. I know it's important to have some "away" time (especially when it comes to keeping a marriage strong), but I will miss my kids and I will miss my friends and I will miss those that gather with me at Church At The Grove. It will be hard to be out of contact with these people for so long.
Will I be totally unreachable? No. But, it costs $9.50/minute to have a conversation by phone with anyone and $0.75/minute for internet access, so unless I want to spend a fortune, I will just have to settle for taking a "relational break" from everyone here. Quite frankly, that's a little hard to imagine.
So what about you? Are relationships with people important to you... to the point that it hurts when you're away? Surprisingly, a lot of us live our lives without investing time into these important relationships. And, when we're gone for a while, we don't miss anyone and nobody misses us. Unfortunately, that's not the way God designed us. He doesn't want us to live on the outskirts of relationships / friendships / people in general. God wants us to dive in to the middle of the groups of people around us, get to know them, let them get to know us, love them, and let them return that love. Then, even when we're unreachable, at least we'll be missed. I'll see you on Mother's Day.
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